| | - 10:00 am, Tuesday. Sitting at my desk typing. Stopping. Getting up, walking towards the door. Turn towards rest of the office and let out a subtle, yet dramatic, sigh. Leave. Never return.
- Calling myself into my own imaginary office. Firing self.
- Steal everyone's lunch and throw them all in the garbage. When people begin to complain, tell them, "Well, if you don't like it, maybe I should just leave and never come back."
- Run up to most annoying coworker. Kick her in the shin.
- Start screaming "That's it! You people are all so stupid and I'm losing respect for myself by being in your presence. I mean, you're all hicks!" Smile, laugh. Give everyone sports related key chains to remember me by.
- Show up to work in nothing but tighty whities. When others bring it up, tell them that since they're all a part of my daily nightmare, I might as incorporate my other nightmares into their lives as well.
- Drunk call company CEO, make frequent references to Enron.
- Take a pee in the lunch room.
- Begin hitting on supervisor by removing my pants and helping her on her golf swing.
- Ask for vacation, never come back. |
| | Posted 4/28/2007 6:28 PM - 42 Views - 5 eProps - 2 comments
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